Thursday, January 25, 2007

Special Agent Hoops McCann

in this week's episode of a brave young artist working under the cover of an innocent clothing store manager, our hero saves the day by confronting a dangerous shoplifter and recovering stolen merchandise from the evil-doer. in actuality, i was discussing x-men trivia with a coworker, and he had me stumped on a killer question regarding cyclops and jean grey's child when the bastard who stole jeans from me a few months back came into the store again. this guy is among the great minds of our generation, for he has devised a foolproof plan to steal jeans by wearing tighter jeans out of the store underneath his baggy jeans. What this criminal failed to understand was that he was in the hands of Hoops McCann, the nations leading loss prevention expert and part time graduate student in hamster cage-cleaning.

As the fool attempted to exit the store, i confronted him about a pair of small womens jeans that were missing from his dressing room, and he gladly opened his backpack to reveal that he was carrying nothing at all. Then i told him flat out that i remembered his face, and my heart pretty much felt like this:

but the guy really wanted to get off free, so he lifted his shirt to "prove" that nothing was hiding under there, and sure enough just under his pants you could actually see the girls jeans under his pants. THEN he turns into the sorriest guy on earth and runs back to the dressing room to return the pants as i call the cops, and he bolts out of the store before anybody can say holy crap did that just happen i think it did Will is going to be given a key to the city.

Four Day's Distance: 23.77 miles

Total Distance Crossed: 683.34 miles

Myton, Utah


oh, and cyclops and jean grey's child is cable:although officially it was jean grey's reincarnated twin or something, and he's from 2000 years in the future and he's half robot. it's kind of fucking complicated.

1 Comments:

At 9:11 PM , Blogger Wlllsdad said...

do you know how hard it is to kick a guy in the nuts through two pairs of jeans ?

 

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