Red Chief vs. Jiffy Lube

We're reporting live beneath the St. Louis arch today, and boy is it metal. In my opinion, this is among the greatest American monuments ever built, as impressive in its own right as say, the Eiffel Tower. The only thing the Eiffel Tower has going for it is being a little older (more booger wipes) and further away than the arch, and more importantly, it lacks robot indians living under it. Does anybody else know about this? Beneath the arch, for people cheap enough to skip the tram ride, is the "Museum of Western Expansion," host to a number of antiquated robotic cowboys and indians who tell their harshly abbreviated stories every 3 and a half minutes, regardless if anybody's listening. Proof!

St. Louis is also home to a number of sports teams i hate with a passion, and one i used to love dearly, almost entirely because this guy was the captain.


Chris Pronger is a mean son of a daisy, but he's 6'6'' and a belligerently violent cheater, therefore making him the perfect hockey player. For a while he and Al MacInnis and Keith Tkachuk were really whooping ass in the NHL. Never Stanley Cup ass, but ass. Now he's being suspended for the Mighty Ducks every other game, and hockey just isn't the same to me. I only have room in my heart for one last place team.

This marks our last day in the state of Missouri, and our official departure of the West. We're entering the portal of the real Midwest now, and odds are we won't be seeing anything of this nature again until at least Ohio.

Another Week's Walks: 52.58 miles

Total Distance Covered: 1,754.22 miles

St Louis, Missouri